Love is one of the most intriguing emotions. Over time, poets have explored it through language, philosophers have debated its meaning, historians have looked at the long story of love in civilizations for generations, and scientists have studied it through evidence and experiments. But how does one actually fall in love, and what are the biological processes behind being in love?
Firstly, love is all about the brain. In the past, many believed that it was linked to the heart due to the physical response to being in love. However, anything that happens when someone is in love originates from the brain. A team of scientists studying love, led by Dr. Helen Fisher at Rutgers, stated that love can be broken down into three categories, each with different corresponding neurochemicals: lust, attraction, and attachment.
Lust is the kind of love driven by the desire for sexual gratification and is characterized by the hormones oestrogen and progesterone. Lust often stems from the evolutionary wiring in our brains to reproduce, shared among all living things. The hypothalamus plays a role in the release of these respective sex hormones from the ovaries/testes. A common stereotype is that testosterone affects men and oestrogen affects women; however, studies have shown that both hormones play a role in each gender, although testosterone may be more abundant in men and oestrogen may be more abundant in women.
Attraction still involves a certain lust for the person we are attracted to; however, it is much more dominated by reward pathways in the brain, releasing feel-good chemicals like dopamine when you are around someone you are attracted to, which is why you often want to spend a lot of time with them. High levels of dopamine and a similar neurochemical, norepinephrine, are secreted by the hypothalamus when one experiences attraction. More surprisingly, there is a reduction in serotonin levels in the body. Serotonin controls a lot to do with appetite, sleep, and behaviour, which is why when someone is experiencing strong attraction, they may have more trouble sleeping than they would otherwise.
Attachment is the predominant factor in long-term relationships and is found in all relationships, from a parent’s attachment with their child to bonds with your friends. Attachment is associated with the hormones oxytocin and vasopressin, which are released in huge quantities not just when around romantic partners, but also in childbirth and breastfeeding. Attachment is the core of a long and happy relationship and is often why a strong friendship is formed before starting a romantic relationship with someone.
So what happens when there isn’t this love, after a breakup for instance? Well, attraction triggers the brain’s reward pathways strikingly similarly to the way drugs do. The same regions of the brain light up during scanning when being attracted to someone as they do for someone on cocaine. When someone is at a loss of love, they often experience similar withdrawal symptoms to someone coming off a drug, which is why the ending of a relationship often affects someone very deeply.
Overall, love tends to be a fickle part of human emotion and can be incredibly unpredictable. There is no formula for falling, being, or losing love. However, understanding our brain’s activity when it comes to love can help us get closer to knowing how love works.
